Mum conquers Kilimanjaro in memory of son James

A mum who climbed Africa’s highest mountain in memory of her young son says the experience has changed the way she sees life.

Harley Cunningham, 42, of Horsell, took on the 5,895-metre Kilimanjaro climb for Cruse Bereavement Support after the death of her 21-month-old son James, one of her twin boys, five years ago.

Harley has now raised more than £13,000, smashing her original £3,000 target with support from more than 220 donors.

Now back home, she says the experience taught her the true meaning of endurance, belonging and gratitude.

Harley said the toughest part came when she was woken at 11.20pm to begin a seven-hour overnight ascent, climbing around 1,300 metres in temperatures of minus 15C.

She said: “You can’t think about anything else apart from putting one foot in front of the other and those deep belly breaths.

“The oxygen is so thin you feel constantly spaced out and feel like you’re suffocating while fighting nausea.”

Despite preparing physically and undergoing altitude training before the trip, Harley said she underestimated how much she would rely on the nine other climbers in her group.

She said: “What I completely underestimated was how much I needed the nine other people in my group to get me through this challenge. We’re now friends for life.

“I have never felt as vulnerable as I did with strangers from day one on that mountain and I also have never laughed so hard in ten days. No barriers. No egos. Just trust and a feeling of pure happiness and belonging.”

The experience also left Harley with a new appreciation of everyday life after spending time with the Tanzanian guides and porters who supported the group.

She said returning home initially felt overwhelming, describing normal life as “noisy and over-complicated”.

Harley said: “I am now truly grateful for being born in the western world with all the basics of life that I need, plus a lot of ‘stuff’ in my life that distracts me or doesn’t make me feel good, which I’ve realised I don’t need.”

One conversation particularly stayed with her.

Assistant chef Michael told Harley his idea of happiness was to visit London and earn more money to support his family, while Harley said the experience had made her want to return to Tanzania to teach English to children.

She said: “What a strange dichotomy on the perception of happiness from different cultures.”

Harley added: “I would recommend anyone to go and climb Kilimanjaro. It is life changing.

“I climbed for me, my family and Cruse Bereavement Support.”

James died from bronchopneumonia after becoming unwell with what Harley and her husband Pete initially believed was a cold.

Harley later received counselling from Cruse and went on to become a volunteer and trustee with the charity.